Spread the love.

When it comes down to it, we all desire one thing- to love and to be loved. Everyone has those moments when they feel completely unappreciated, unrespected and unloved. I have been lucky enough to always have a constant support system of amazing people who have been with me through all the ups and downs of life. Unfortunately, not everyone has people like that in their life. Some have to independently have enough faith, energy and motivation without the ability to rely on others.

Sometimes I forget how much "my people" make a difference in my life. Now that I'm so far from home, it's been hard to adjust to all the changes.... and I'm not talking about the new apartment, new job, and warmer weather. I'm talking about the absence of all my favorite people back home. I have forgotten how much I appreciate being surrounded by some of the most hilarious and genuine people I've ever known. I love to make new friends, but no one can replace someone who has been by best friend since preschool or someone I've spent countless nights drinking cocktails with and acting like a complete idiot. Those are the people that make it hard to accept the fact that I really am eight hours away from the life I've known for so long.

I've never been the type to settle in one place for too long, but eventually I'm going to have to find comfort in the fact that no matter where I am, I'll always have certain people who make it all worth while. I personally think that being surrounded by just two amazing friends is better than having fifteen mediocre ones. That's why I know that even though some of my favorite people are far away, it really doesn't make a difference because I know I can always depend on them to be there for me. I find comfort in the fact that no matter where I live, I will always have that one small town to visit that I will forever call "home".

There's a great song by an artist named Sara Bareilles called "Many the Miles" and there's a lyric to this song that I love. It says "I do whatever I can wherever I end up/To keep giving my good love/And spreading it around, yeah/Cause I've had my fair share of take care and goodbyes/I've learned how to cry and I'm better for that." That is exactly how I like to live... no matter where I live or who I meet, I like to try and be the person who, no matter how many people have caused me tears, still has love to spread. It might sound cheesy, but the small amount of people who only stayed in my life for a short time obviously ended up there for some reason, even if it was just to help me learn how to deal with goodbyes. But the ones who will be in my life forever are the people who have always had love to share. I like to try and be that person to everyone I meet. You should, too :)

Random, mind boggling thoughts.

So it's been a month since I last posted on here and I am pretty disappointed in myself! When I started this blog, I thought I would be inspired to write something at least once a week. I've been pre-occupied with so many other things that I almost forgot I started this blog, until a lot of random thoughts popped into my mind and I remembered this is the perfect place to record them!



It's crazy when I think about how many times I am so sure I know what's right for my life, but God has a way of showing me otherwise. Four years ago, (and I can't believe it's been that long!) I packed up all my stuff and moved 30 hours from home to a city I'd never been to. Who does that?! When I got to Tempe, Arizona, I only had fun for like a week. After a few months, I sold my bed, threw away a bunch of stuff, packed up the PrincessMobile and decided I was destined to be a Cali girl. I drove for six hours and moved to the state with more BMWs, plastic surgery and bad attitudes than I'd ever experienced in my life! After a month of not finding a job and making no friends, I figured that might be God's way of telling me superficial California wasn't everything I thought it was. The ocean is amazing and palm trees are my favorite, but those aren't exactly things that could make me stay there. So I spent around $250 to fed ex the only things worth keeping back to Michigan. I sold the PrincessMobile for $500 and begged my dad to buy me a one way plane ticket home. Some people might call it a complete failure, but hey, I learned a lot and actually had some fun! Because of that little adventure, I am fully aware that I am not the one who knows what's best for my life. So now I leave that up to God! :)



Something else I've been thinking about... It is not only exciting, but frightening not knowing what a new day may bring. For the past year, I have been living with someone who is full of more life, energy and laughter than anyone I have ever known. When she was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer a few months ago, I could not think of any reason why it had to be her. Why couldn't some miserable life-hating person be struck with this sickness?!! It's really not fair and I have been praying to understand why terrible things like this happen. Last week, I was having a conversation with my roomate and out of the blue, she told me that she thinks this happened to her to teach some people she knows to enjoy and appreciate their life more. I had never thought about it that way, but it made me realize that her cancer has already done just that to some certain people in her life. It amazes me how she has learned to accept the fact that she has a terminal illness. If something terrible ever happens in my life, I can only pray to be half as strong as she is.



So those are some random, mind-boggling thoughts I have been having lately. Hopefully I will be inspired to write again soon! :) xo

An imprint on your heart.

I am a firm believer in the fact that each and every person comes into your life for a reason. Certain people may only stay for a short time just to teach us some type of lesson. Others stick around our whole lives and we never stop learning things from them. I've already experienced both situations. It is truly sad when I actually realize that some people who I once called my best friends are people who I have spent time with only once or twice this year. It is extremely hard to balance every aspect of life and maintain relationships with everyone you've ever been close to.

I often find myself wondering how and why I have lost touch with certain people. As our lives take different paths, I suppose it just becomes harder and harder to stay connected with each and every close friend. When I think back to high school, there were certain people who made those four years unforgettable and I am so grateful for them. When I think back to cosmetology school, it's the same type of scenario. There were certain people I met there who made those 11 stressful months extremely memorable. When I think about the two years I spent working at the same salon, I know I wouldn't have enjoyed myself without a couple amazing girls I met there. When I think about the 5 1/2 years I have spent working at the same bar, I am instantly reminded of some of my very best friends who I met from working there. Although I may not still be the best of friends with everyone from every place in my life, the ones who are still in my "recent calls" list are the ones who were meant to be there all along.

It's even harder to stay connected with people when everyone starts moving all over the country. I have an amazing friend who I've known since middle school and although there is a 3 hour time difference because she lives out west, we still find time to stay caught up on eachother's lives. That is the type of person that I know I'm meant to stay close with forever. There's also people who I have known for years and recently haven't had the chance to see them as often as I'd like to. But as soon as we get together, we are able to pick up right where we left off. Those are also the type of people I will always find myself keeping in touch with. They are the ones who, at some point in your life, leave an imprint on your heart that never seems to fade away. Not only do they love you no matter what, but they accept you for who you are and never want you to change. I couldn't imagine life without them.

Although situations and people constantly change, I find it comforting to know I have a handful of friends who will always stay the same. They will always be there for me and I know for a fact that I can always trust them. It's sad to think about the people who have drifted in and out of my life, but I know there was a specific reason they were there in the first place. I am thankful for all the wonderful people who keep me sane and love me just the way I am! :)

OMG! WTF. it's NBD :)

I, like most people, try at all costs to avoid the dreadful act of confrontation. It's never a comfortable situation and always something I put off. With so many new forms of communication these days, people can usually find a way to avoid face to face confrontation. Whether it be through a text message, email or tweet, it's easy to get away with approaching a touchy subject without physically speaking to someone. Whatever happened to the great act of talking on the phone or meeting for coffee? It seems those times are long gone and have left without warning! The last time I renewed my cell phone contract, I reduced the amount of allowed daytime minutes on my plan and added a media package with unlimited internet access and text messaging. What does this tell you?? I have fallen into the trap of non-verbal communication!!

I think I am a pretty easy person to talk to and sometimes wonder if anyone has ever avoided confronting me about something, like I have done to so many people! I will probably never know, but it's just a thought. I personally believe that I rest better and live happier knowing I don't have any growing frustrations with people. I have recently learned that in the end, it's better just to confront them about the situation instead of laying in bed at night going over the scenario in your head. I've been thinking a lot lately about how I really can't stand conflict in any shape or form. I don't like getting in fights with people and usually avoid any type of misunderstanding. Sometimes I wish I could be a little more firm and not let certain things just pass by me without putting up a fight. But at the end of the day, arguing with someone is just wasting moments you could be laughing, so what's the point?

I am actually feeling inspired to try and think if there is anyone I have bad feelings toward and do whatever I can to make it right. I personally like to practice what I preach! So just remember, it's a world of non-verbal communication. All you have to do is send someone a 160 character text ending in a smiley and I bet everything will be better!

:) :P :D ;)

it's only what you make of it.

My parents have never been overly wealthy and I have two sisters, so growing up I always knew if I really wanted something, I had to earn it. My mom would assign me certain chores to do before I could get those new earrings or shoes I wanted. If I didn't want to work for something, I knew I would have to wait for my birthday or Christmas. Sometimes I wondered why my friends always had fancy new things when it wasn't even a holiday. I would beg my mom for something at the store, even though I knew she wouldn't cave in. My parents have always been frugile and I am so glad they passed that trait on to me.



I got my first job when I was fourteen as a busser at a dinky little restaurant in my home town. I honestly made $4.50/hr plus tips to clean up people's messes. I never looked forward to going to work, but I quickly became one of the first ones out of my friends to get my own cell phone. I saved up my money until I had enough to buy one and had to make sure I paid the bill every month. Knowing I was working hard to allow myself the luxury of a cell phone made me appreciate it even more.



I didn't get my driver's license until I was seventeen, which I thought was a major life tragedy. I was lucky enough to be blessed with a free car. Yes, I said free. It was a '96 Chrysler Sebring with some mechanical issues. Thankfully, my dad was able to fix everything and once he had it up and running, the PrincessMobile was a big hit! Not only did I have to make sure I could afford gas, but my parents told me I was responsible for paying my own car insurance every month. At the time, I was working at a clothing store in the mall. I gave up my weekends to make sure I worked enough to be able to pay my cell phone bill and my car insurance. Most of my other friends had no reason to get a job, because their parents paid for everything. Sadly, a lot of those people are still the same way.



Now that I am almost 23 years old and have experienced the real world for myself, I can honestly admit that I am thankful my parents didn't hand me anything and everything I wanted. No one will do that for you in reality. I was taught at a young age that if you want something, you have to work for it. If I hadn't known that firsthand, then I wouldn't have been able to conquer all of the amazing experiences life has brought me.



It's funny how I can look back and laugh at myself as a teenager. I hated that my parents didn't hand out money to me whenever I wanted and I absolutely despised paying all my own bills. But I am honestly very grateful that I learned not to expect people to take care of me. This has helped me embrace my independence and become aware that I am strong enough to take care of myself.



This is why I find it hard to have any sympathy for those people who are constantly complaining about one thing or another. If you are really that unhappy, why don't you do something about it instead of drowning us all in your negativity? I know firsthand that not everyone lives a charmed life. I clearly was not handed everything on a silver platter, but there will probably always be someone who has it worse off than you do. Sometimes you just need to take a step back and figure out what you can do for yourself to get to a better place. Most likely, there is no one who is going to fix your problems or hand you everything you need to do so. It's only what you make of it, so find some positive energy and do something to help yourself. You'll find many new commendable things in your life and be able to appreciate them a lot more knowing you've worked hard and earned it all!

It's all about perspective.

Changing your perspective can make a huge difference to how you percieve a somewhat tragic event. I have learned that even what seems to be the worst situation can end up making me happier than I was before the "tragedy". It doesn't take a winning mega-millions ticket or a huge promotion to be satisfied. Trust me, I have had the opposite of those things and yet I am at a better place right now than I ever thought I would be.



For almost two years, I worked at a salon where I thought I would stay working for a very long time. I met two of my very best friends there and spent my days making people look beautiful. I would always rave to people about how much fun I had at work and all of my clients seemed to notice that I genuinely loved what I was doing. I met so many new people and learned so many new things just from every day conversation. Who could really ask for anything more in a job? Well, once the salon made some changes and brought in new management, there was a woman from the corporate office who would make frequent visits to our location. I never really got to know her too well because my days were usually full of haircut after haircut. But for some reason, I got a weird vibe from her. Whenever she would come around, it seemed as though people didn't act like themselves. I, personally, do not feel as though I need to change who I am for anyone. So I didn't. I am an outgoing and enthusiastic person and that is the way I will always be. Because of that, this woman felt the need to inform me that I didn't take my job seriously. Oh, and she kindly said, "You dress like you are going to the bar, not going to work." Unfortunately, I was only getting paid $11.50/hour at the time and Forever21 was the only store in my budget! Besides, I never wore anything revealing and never went against the dress code. I was strictly stylish. Aren't hair stylists supposed to be fashionable? Well, like I said before, I do not change who I am for anyone. No one can tell me to be a more serious person. I smile and laugh a lot. Deal with it! And no one can tell me what to wear. I am not a plain jane and I sometimes like to over accessorize. So what?!



When I lost my job this past January, I was in shock. I had no idea what to do with myself. It came out of nowhere but it was obviously a wakeup call. I wasn't completely clear on the reasoning, so I was in a state of confusion for awhile. It took some time, but I am very confident that God has a much more fascinating plan for my life. I cannot believe I honestly thought that working at this salon was my calling. I can laugh about it now because losing my job was the best thing that could have happened to me. I am now fully aware that it's time to start putting to use all of the other amazing talents God has blessed me with. If you take the time to change perspectives, you can see that there's much more good than bad to a situation that may seem like a tragedy. Don't change who you are for anyone. God has made you a certain way for a reason. If I was still working at that salon, I would never have all of these new doors opening for me and new opportunities to achieve much greater things. I don't regret those two years for anything. I met some awesome people who have changed my life for the better and for that I am thankful. But if there's one thing I have learned it's this: change your perspective... not yourself. :)

Status: single.

When you see a long distance relative for the first time in awhile, why is it that the first thing they ask is "sooo are you dating anyone?" My response is always, "no" so I am not sure why they keep asking!

Yes, I am always the single girl out of my friends, but I am used to it and to be honest, I am completely fine with it. I usually only go on first dates. People typically think I don't give the guy a fair chance or that I am too picky, but I am fully aware of what I am looking for. It only takes one or two dates to know if someone has these certain qualities. If they don't, I know it's not worth going out again. I don't want to lead them on and I'm certainly not going to settle. Carrie Bradshaw says it best (as always!): "Some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies." It's so true!

It makes me really sad to see people in relationships just because it's comfortable and it's all

they've ever known. Seriously, how do you know if they are really the right person if they are the only person you've ever dated since 10th grade? Some people may believe in "high school sweethearts" and that's really sweet and all, but I still think you need to see what else is out there before you truly know if they are the one.

I can't help but wonder if I am just too selfish to ever settle down! It might sound strange that I would admit that, but I like to do what I want, when I want to do it. I plan spontaneous vacations because I can. I sit around half the day in my pajamas because I can. I am taking my time going to college because I can. I don't know that I could imagine actually having to compromise or give up my independence. For now I am completely happy with the place I am at. Someday when I meet the right person, I am sure I'll realize all the things that were missing. But I am really in no hurry. I am honestly having the time of my life right now and I know not everyone can say that!

Thanks to my awesome friends who don't always have to be with their boyfriends! I love you guys and I love our girls nights out! :)